How a Weekend Retreat Saved My Marriage

I made a horrible mistake when I cheated on my wife, Susan.  Fortunately for me, she found it in her heart to forgive me.  The bad news was that, although Susan had decided to take me back, we were definitely feeling the strain in our relationship.

It soon became clear that we weren’t going to be able to get past this major mistake unless we took drastic action, so we decided to sign up for a marriage retreat.  Now, I wasn’t really thrilled about the idea of going away for a weekend so we could “get in touch with our inner souls,” but I decided to give it a try anyway.  Besides, I messed up big and it was going to take doing something big to make up for it.

After much searching, we decided to go to a retreat being offered in Vermont that was being offered by Israel and Cathie Helfand.  I tell you something, I was really impressed. With the help of the sessions at the retreat, we learned how to better communicate with one another and how to gain a deeper understanding of how we are each feeling.  I know that most guys don’t like to talk about their feelings, and I am no exception.  At the same time, it really helped me to get a better understanding of why I cheated on my wife in the first place.  As a result, I know I won’t make the same mistakes again.

The retreat was really helpful for my wife, too, because she learned that my infidelity was not a reflection upon her.  She didn’t do anything wrong.  She has always been very good to me and she didn’t deserve what I did to her.  Strangely enough, she had been carrying around a lot of guilt and blame as she beat herself up trying to figure out where she had gone wrong.

Another great part about the retreat was that it was like a short vacation for us.  The counselors gave us suggestions of things to do after our sessions were complete.  The time we spent together, just enjoying each other’s company really helped us to grow closer together and to bond at a whole new level.

I really regret what I did to my wife, but we are slowly getting our lives back on track. I am sure my infidelity will always be in the back of her mind somewhere, but I think she is learning to trust me again.  That retreat really went a long way toward helping us get our lives back together and I am glad I went despite my initial reluctance.